WHAT TRUMP CAN TEACH UNIONS (MOUGA)

Love him or hate him, but union leaders can learn something from studying what he has done to get his way in business, government, and a few other more intimate areas. So, we have outlined below the most critical organizational components “Trump style” national union presidents need to establish their own “autocracy edging toward a dictatorship.”  

1. If you must have a second nationally elected officer, make sure your Vice President has no formal powers or tasks under the union constitution and bylaws. Don’t make them a Secretary/Treasurer because that position comes with access to the finances. Also try to find someone who gets the job only because you tapped him/her for elevation; consider giving them a pre-election fancy assignment or  job to boost their exposure. You do not want a Number #2 who has their own power base or widespread respect. That only makes them capable of standing up to the president for an ethical or moral principle.  Ideally, you want a sycophant, i.e., a person who acts obsequiously toward someone important to gain something they would not otherwise ever get. Find an Eric or Vance—someone the prez could make disappear without anyone caring.
2. Arrange your constitution so that only you have access to the day-to-day details of what money is spent on, what investment decisions are made, and what subsidiary corporations are created, e.g., to sell steaks or hats or insurance, etc.  Rather than giving another elected officer access, hire your own Alan Weisselberg—someone whose life you have so much control over that they would break laws and go to jail rather than reveal how you spend union dues, make disastrous investments moves, or distribute six-figure pay outs for non-disclosure agreements.
3. Make sure the union rules provide that you would be the only person who has the power to hire staff.  No approval or even input by the executive board cabinet would be required no matter how significant the position to be filled. Not even a right to advance notice as a courtesy would be required or expected. Let it be known that if someone asks for that they automatically move to your enemies list. (P.S. Keep an enemies list.)
4. Fill your executive board with people who have no power base of their own, whether it be in terms of votes they control, influence they can use, or plain old broad respect. Local union activists looking to ease into retirement, in retirement already, or who have just lost the motivation to rock any boats are ideal. Whatever you do, install a rule that prevents anyone in a position of power independent of you from even running for the job unless they give up that power. You want board people who want the job for the prestige and trips that come with it, not someone who wants to accomplish something good. (Think Matt Gaetz.)
5. Make sure the prez has no obligation to tell the board anything, give them access to data, or provide reports.  Create a tradition of keeping board members busy with something akin to a Mara Largo party weekend so there is little time for them to think about business.
6. Arrange your bylaws so you never need approval from the union’s electorate or their representatives to increase the union’s annual dues income. Make those raises automatic and very hard to stop.
7. Be sure the union’s rules enable you to fire key staffers, e.g., staff supervisors, without any notice, due process, right of appeal, or severance pay.  Remember how Trump did it on his show “The Apprentice?”  Do that.  Belittle and humiliate them.  Show zero consideration for a key staffer’s multi-year contributions, dignity, or family when they upset you. Make sure that there are no Douglas Factors in your union. That will keep the rest of the key people in line.
8. Get the ability to pay hundreds of thousands in hush money to ex-employees, local union leaders, people with whom you only had a personal relationship but who knew damaging things about you, etc. Simply making sure the constitution does not require you to inform the board when you buy someone’s silence should do.
9. Make the rules so complicated that it is virtually impossible for anyone to file charges against you or try to impeach you. Force anyone trying to do that to go through multiple committees, the members of which you appoint.
10. As the president of “Trump United” you need the power to make all assignments to any committees without any need to meet a pre-set criteria or explain why you chose who you did. Even when they meet, give them a script to work from and install a watcher who can speed-dial you if the committee wanders from your script.
11. Check with your legal counsel to make sure it is clear that every staffer works for you, even though the locals they service may think that they are the local’s attorney acting in its best interest. Trump’s buddy Putin would call these folks embedded political officers.
12. Keep an outside legal counsel on retainer so that you can go to it directly without going through the union’s own staff lawyers. You never know who you might have to screw over, e.g., your General Counsel, or who might be a principled whistle-blowing staffer.
13. Limit the power of locals to make the most significant decisions an employee representative can make.  For example, permit them to request or recommend arbitration of a case or endorsement of a local political candidate for Congress, but only you make the decision without any need to explain yourself.
14. Personally own everything.  That starts with consolidating locals and transferring all certificates of exclusive recognition to the national office. Another great scheme is to put yourself in charge of doling out official time allotments around the unit.
15. Absolutely, positively prohibit the formation of any mid-level councils between the local and the prez. They will only want some authority and input, neither of which you should allow or share. Power to the people is only something that exists in the minds of free people, not bargaining units.
16. Finally, be a nice person in public, get a make over so you look the part, have the PR department splash your face all over any media they produce, don’t be afraid to photoshop yourself into gatherings of important Washington, DC powerbrokers, etc.
17. Collect every local union leader’s private non-government email and share that with no one.  It will come in handy when you run for office or want to whip folks up against a malcontent in your midst.
18. Don’t pay your executive board members a dime for their service. That will only motivate stronger people to run for the job.

Above all, remember that dissent from within the membership is to be highly discouraged and punished.

There isn’t a union in the federal sector that would not benefit from being better led.  If you have a Messiah complex or are simply ready to make your union great again (MOUGA), this is one way to do it. On the other hand, if you are one of those democracy-obsessed people who respect checks and balances on power and the input of others, you can use this list to rate your own union’s situation.  Should your union give its president more than 10 of the 18 items listed, your union’s democracy rating is somewhere between Vlad Putin’s and Charley Manson.